Months 11-12 Detailed Schedule

Weeks 39-44: Phase 4 - Navigate Conflict

Everything you’ve learned gets tested when conflict arises. Phase 4 teaches you to handle the hardest conversations - with skill, empathy, and courage. Conflict isn’t failure; it’s inevitable. The question is whether you navigate it skillfully or destructively.

How to Use This Schedule

Daily Time Commitment: 30-60 minutes

• Morning option: During baby’s first nap
• Evening option: After baby’s bedtime
• Split option: 15 min morning + 15-30 min evening

Flexibility Rules:

• Miss a day? Just continue where you left off
• Behind schedule? Skip optional items (marked with *)
• Ahead? Move to next day or go deeper on current material

Icons:

• :movie_camera: Video/Course
• :books: Reading
• :headphones: Audiobook-friendly
• :memo: Writing/Reflection
• :wrench: Setup task
• :brain: AI practice
• :zap: Quick task (< 15 min)

Phase 4 Overview

Week 39: Difficult Conversations - The Three Conversations

Goal: Complete “Difficult Conversations” + Understand the three conversations in every conflict

Day 267 (Monday)

Video: Search “Sheila Heen TEDx feedback” on YouTube

The Core Premise:

Every difficult conversation is actually THREE conversations happening at once.

Why This Book First:

• From the Harvard Negotiation Project (same team as “Getting to Yes”)
• The foundation for understanding ALL conflict
• Once you see the three conversations, you can’t unsee them

Your Avoided Conversation: Write down one difficult conversation you’ve been avoiding:

• Who is it with? _______________
• What’s it about? _______________
• Why have you avoided it? _______________

Day 268 (Tuesday)

The Three Conversations:

Conversation 1: “What Happened?”

The Truth and Perception Problem:

• There is no “truth” - there are two stories
• Each person sees different data
• Each person interprets differently
• Neither story is complete

The Shift:

Day 269 (Wednesday)

The “And Stance”:

Don’t choose between stories. Hold both:

• “I think I worked hard AND you think I could have done more”
• “I felt hurt AND you didn’t intend to hurt me”
• “My intentions were good AND the impact was harmful”

Contribution vs. Blame:

The Question:

“What did I contribute to this situation?”

This doesn’t mean taking blame. It means understanding the system.

AI prompt:

I had a conflict with [person] about [situation].

Help me map this from BOTH perspectives:
1. What I saw and experienced
2. What they probably saw and experienced
3. What assumptions am I making about their intentions?
4. What might they be assuming about my intentions?
5. What did each of us contribute to this situation?

Day 270 (Thursday)

Conversation 2: The Feelings Conversation

The Mistake: Treating emotions as irrelevant The Truth: Unexpressed feelings leak out anyway

Feelings vocabulary (expand yours):

How to Share Feelings:

• Name them directly: “I feel frustrated”
• Not accusations: NOT “You make me frustrated”
• With context: “I feel frustrated because this matters to me”

Conversation 3: The Identity Conversation

Three Core Identities at Risk:

All-or-Nothing Thinking:

• Threat: “If I made a mistake, I’m a total failure”
• Complexity: “I’m a person who sometimes makes mistakes AND is still competent”

Ground Your Identity: Accept that you are BOTH:

• Someone who tries hard AND sometimes falls short
• Someone with good intentions AND sometimes causes harm
• Someone who is competent AND still learning

Day 271 (Friday)

How to Start a Difficult Conversation:

Don’t Start With Your Conclusion:

• BAD: “We need to talk about your poor performance”
• GOOD: “I’d like to understand what’s been happening with the project”

Start from the Third Story:

The Third Story is what a neutral observer would see:

• Your story: “You’re always late”
• Their story: “I’m overwhelmed”
• Third story: “We have different expectations about timing”

The Opening:

“I wanted to talk about [X]. I have some concerns, and I’d like to understand your perspective.”

Purpose Check: Before starting, ask yourself:

1. What do I want to learn?
2. What do I want to share?
3. What do I want for the relationship?

Day 272 (Saturday) - Lighter Day

Problem-Solving Together:

After understanding, move to solving:

1. Generate options together
2. Ask: “What would work for you?”
3. Find creative solutions
4. Test for understanding

When They’re Difficult:

Script Your Conversation:

For the conversation you’ve been avoiding:

Opening (Third Story):

“I wanted to talk about ____________. I’ve been thinking about it, and I want to understand your perspective.”

Your Story:

“From my point of view, ____________”

Curiosity:

“I’m curious how you see it? What’s been going on for you?”

Feelings:

“I feel ____________ because ____________”

Request:

“I’m hoping we can ____________”

Day 273 (Sunday) - Review + Transition

Difficult Conversations Summary:

The Transformation:

Week 39 Checkpoint

Before moving to Week 40, you should have:

• Read “Difficult Conversations”
• Understood the Three Conversations framework
• Scripted your avoided conversation
• Created 5+ flashcards
• Obtained “Getting to Yes”

Week 40: Getting to Yes - Principled Negotiation

Goal: Complete “Getting to Yes” + Master BATNA and principled negotiation

Day 274 (Monday)

TED Talk: The Walk from ‘No’ to ‘Yes’

The Core Premise:

Negotiate based on PRINCIPLES, not POSITIONS.

Position vs. Interest:

William Ury’s Key Insight:

“Go to the balcony” - Step back from the emotion to see the situation clearly.

Day 275 (Tuesday)

Principle 1: Separate People from Problems

The Formula:

“I understand you’re frustrated AND we still need to solve this.”

Common Mistake:

• Attacking the person: “You’re being unreasonable”
• Better: “This situation is challenging. Let’s figure it out together.”

Relationship + Substance:

• Don’t sacrifice relationship for substance
• Don’t sacrifice substance for relationship
• You can have BOTH

Day 276 (Wednesday)

Principle 2: Focus on Interests, Not Positions

The Orange Story: Two sisters fighting over the last orange.

• Position: “I want the orange”
• Solution: Cut it in half

BUT if they’d asked about interests:

• Sister 1: Wanted the juice (to drink)
• Sister 2: Wanted the peel (to bake)

Both could have gotten 100% of what they needed.

How to Uncover Interests:

AI prompt:

I'm in a negotiation about: [situation]

My position is: [what I'm asking for]
Their position is: [what they're asking for]

Help me:
1. What might be MY underlying interests (not just position)?
2. What might be THEIR underlying interests?
3. What questions could I ask to uncover their real interests?
4. What creative options might satisfy both sets of interests?

Day 277 (Thursday)

Principle 3: Invent Options for Mutual Gain

Expand the Pie Before Dividing It:

• Don’t assume it’s zero-sum
• Look for trades: “I’ll give you X if you give me Y”
• Find low-cost, high-value trades

Brainstorming Rules:

1. Separate inventing from deciding
2. Generate many options before evaluating
3. Look for shared interests
4. Make their decision easy

Low-Cost, High-Value Trades:

Find things that:

• Cost you little but matter to them
• Cost them little but matter to you

Example:

• You want flexibility (costs them nothing)
• They want reliability (costs you nothing)
• Trade: You commit to consistent delivery, they allow flexible hours

Day 278 (Friday)

Principle 4: Insist on Objective Criteria

Sources of Objective Criteria:

• Market value
• Precedent (what’s been done before)
• Scientific/expert opinion
• Legal standards
• Efficiency

BATNA: Best Alternative to Negotiated Agreement

Your power in any negotiation comes from your alternatives.

Calculate Your BATNA:

1. What will you do if this negotiation fails?
2. What are your alternatives?
3. How good are they?

The Rule:

Never accept a deal worse than your BATNA. Never reject a deal better than your BATNA.

Your BATNA Worksheet:

Current negotiation: _______________

If this fails, I could:

My best alternative is: _______________ This means I should accept anything better than: _______________

Day 279 (Saturday) - Lighter Day

When They Won’t Play:

What if the other side:

• Uses dirty tricks?
• Won’t negotiate on principles?
• Has more power?

Negotiation Jujitsu:

• Don’t push back; redirect
• Ask questions instead of statements
• Use silence
• Ask for the reasoning behind their position

Develop Your Strategy:

For your next negotiation:

Day 280 (Sunday) - Review + Transition

Getting to Yes Summary:

Week 40 Checkpoint

Before moving to Week 41, you should have:

• Watched William Ury TED Talk
• Read “Getting to Yes”
• Calculated your BATNA for a real negotiation
• Designed a negotiation strategy
• Created 10+ flashcards (cumulative)
• Obtained “Nonviolent Communication”

Week 41: Nonviolent Communication - Speaking from the Heart

Goal: Complete “Nonviolent Communication” + Practice OFNR daily

Day 281 (Monday)

Video: Search “Marshall Rosenberg NVC workshop” on YouTube (3+ hours available, start with first section)

The Core Premise:

Connect with yourself and others through honest expression and empathic listening.

Why “Nonviolent”?

• Violence = any language that judges, blames, or demands
• Nonviolent = language that expresses feelings and needs
• The goal: Connection, not control

The Question NVC Asks:

“What are you feeling? What do you need?”

This applies to BOTH:

• What am I feeling and needing?
• What are THEY feeling and needing?

Day 282 (Tuesday)

Component 1: OBSERVATIONS (Not Evaluations)

The Difference:

The Test: Could a video camera capture this? If not, it’s an evaluation.

Practice Conversions:

Day 283 (Wednesday)

Component 2: FEELINGS (Not Thoughts)

Feelings vs. Pseudo-Feelings:

The Test: “I feel that…” = a thought “I feel…” [emotion word] = a feeling

Feelings Vocabulary:

When needs ARE met:

When needs are NOT met:

Day 284 (Thursday)

Component 3: NEEDS (Universal Human Needs)

All Humans Share These Needs:

Connecting Feelings to Needs:

AI prompt:

I'm having a difficult interaction with someone.

Situation: [describe what happened]

Help me identify:
1. What am I OBSERVING (facts only, no judgments)?
2. What am I FEELING (emotions, not thoughts)?
3. What NEEDS of mine are (un)met?
4. What might THEY be feeling?
5. What NEEDS might they have?

Day 285 (Friday)

Component 4: REQUESTS (Not Demands)

The Difference:

Good Requests Are:

Bad → Good:

Day 286 (Saturday) - Lighter Day + Practice

The Full OFNR Pattern:

“When I [OBSERVATION]… I feel [FEELING]… because I need [NEED]… Would you be willing to [REQUEST]?”

Example:

“When I see dishes in the sink from this morning… I feel frustrated… because I need order and shared responsibility… Would you be willing to wash your dishes before bed tonight?”

Your Practice:

Think of a current frustration. Fill in:

Observation: When I see/hear _______________

Feeling: I feel _______________

Need: Because I need _______________

Request: Would you be willing to _______________?

Day 287 (Sunday) - Review + Transition

Nonviolent Communication Summary:

The Gift of Empathy: Apply OFNR to understand THEM too:

• What are they observing?
• What are they feeling?
• What needs are alive in them?
• What are they requesting?

Week 41 Checkpoint

Before moving to Week 42, you should have:

• Watched Marshall Rosenberg NVC workshop
• Read “Nonviolent Communication”
• Practiced OFNR on at least 3 situations
• Expanded your feelings vocabulary
• Created 15+ flashcards (cumulative)
• Obtained “Thanks for the Feedback”

Week 42: Thanks for the Feedback - Receiving Well

Goal: Complete “Thanks for the Feedback” + Understand feedback triggers

Day 288 (Monday)

The Core Premise:

The key to receiving feedback well is understanding why we reject it.

Three Types of Feedback:

The Problem: We often get one type when we need another:

• Want appreciation, get coaching
• Want coaching, get evaluation
• Ask for feedback, feel attacked

Day 289 (Tuesday)

Trigger 1: TRUTH TRIGGERS

“This feedback is WRONG!”

What Happens:

• We dismiss feedback because we think it’s inaccurate
• We focus on proving it wrong
• We never consider what might be right

The Skill: Separate Content from Delivery

The Truth About Truth:

• Feedback is never 100% right
• It’s also never 100% wrong
• Your job: Find the 10% that might be useful

Ask:

“What’s RIGHT about this feedback, even if the delivery is off?”

Day 290 (Wednesday)

Trigger 2: RELATIONSHIP TRIGGERS

“Who are YOU to tell ME this?”

What Happens:

• We reject feedback because of who’s giving it
• “They’re not qualified”
• “They’re a hypocrite”
• “They have their own agenda”

Two Issues Get Mixed:

1. The CONTENT of the feedback (what they said)
2. The RELATIONSHIP with the giver (how you feel about them)

The Skill: Separate the Two

Even if:

• The person is annoying
• They have flaws too
• They delivered it badly

…the feedback might still contain truth.

AI prompt:

I received feedback that triggered me because of who gave it:

The feedback was: [what they said]
The giver is: [their relationship to me]
My reaction: [how I felt about them giving this]

Help me:
1. Separate the content from the giver
2. What might be true about the feedback, regardless of source?
3. What's my relationship issue that I should address separately?

Day 291 (Thursday)

Trigger 3: IDENTITY TRIGGERS

“This threatens who I think I am!”

What Happens:

• Feedback challenges our self-image
• We go into defense mode
• We can’t hear anything useful

The Three Identity Stories:

The Skill: Maintain Complexity

Right-sizing:

• Don’t exaggerate: “This one criticism ruins everything”
• Don’t minimize: “It’s no big deal” (when it is)
• Find the actual size of the feedback

Day 292 (Friday)

Getting Better at Receiving:

Before:

• Recognize your trigger patterns
• Know your “wiring” (how you typically react)
• Prepare for triggering situations

During:

• Buy time: “Let me think about that”
• Separate content from delivery
• Ask clarifying questions

After:

• Ask: “What’s ONE thing I could do differently?”
• Experiment with the feedback
• Follow up with the giver

Questions That Help:

Your Trigger Profile:

Which trigger affects you most?

• Truth (I focus on what’s wrong about the feedback)
• Relationship (I focus on who’s giving it)
• Identity (I feel threatened about who I am)

Day 293 (Saturday) - Lighter Day

Pulling Feedback:

Instead of waiting for feedback (push), actively seek it (pull):

Your Feedback Request:

This week, ask three people:

1. Person: _______________ Question: “What’s one thing I could do differently in [X]?”

2. Person: _______________ Question: “What am I not seeing about [Y]?”

3. Person: _______________ Question: “If you had to suggest one improvement, what would it be?”

Day 294 (Sunday) - Review + Transition

Thanks for the Feedback Summary:

The Receiving Stance:

“What can I learn from this, even if it’s delivered poorly?”

Week 42 Checkpoint

Before moving to Week 43, you should have:

• Read “Thanks for the Feedback”
• Identified your primary feedback trigger
• Asked for specific feedback from 3 people
• Created 20+ flashcards (cumulative)
• Obtained “Getting Past No” and “The Anatomy of Peace”

Week 43: Getting Past No + The Anatomy of Peace

Goal: Complete both books + Master breakthrough negotiation strategies

Day 295 (Monday)

When “Getting to Yes” Doesn’t Work:

“Getting Past No” is for when the other side:

• Won’t cooperate
• Uses dirty tricks
• Has more power
• Refuses to negotiate

The 5 Breakthrough Strategies:

Day 296 (Tuesday)

Strategy 1: Go to the Balcony

When attacked, we naturally:

• Strike back
• Give in
• Break off

The Balcony: Imagine you’re watching from above:

• What’s really happening here?
• What are they trying to achieve?
• What’s my goal?

Tactics:

• Pause before responding
• Name the game: “It seems like we’ve gotten stuck”
• Buy time: “Let me think about that”

Strategy 2: Step to Their Side

Disarm them by acknowledging their perspective.

Acknowledge Without Agreeing:

• “I understand you’re frustrated”
• “You have a point about X”
• “I can see this matters to you”

AI prompt:

I'm in a difficult negotiation where the other person is being adversarial.

They're saying/doing: [describe their behavior]
My natural reaction is: [describe your instinct]

Help me:
1. What would "going to the balcony" look like here?
2. How could I "step to their side" without giving up my position?
3. What could I acknowledge that might disarm them?

Day 297 (Wednesday)

Strategy 3: Reframe

Change the game from positions to interests.

Reframing Techniques:

The Power of Questions:

• Questions shift from demanding to curious
• They can’t be wrong (it’s just a question)
• They invite thinking rather than defending

Strategy 4: Build a Golden Bridge

Make it easy for them to say yes.

Obstacles to Agreement:

• It’s not their idea
• They’ll look weak
• They’ll lose face
• Change is hard

The Bridge:

Day 298 (Thursday)

Strategy 5: Use Power to Educate

Show consequences, but don’t threaten.

The Difference:

The Goal: Not to punish, but to make clear the cost of not agreeing.

The Anatomy of Peace - Introduction:

A different lens on conflict: the HEART.

Two Ways of Being:

Self-Betrayal: When we betray what we know is right, we justify it by seeing others negatively.

Day 299 (Friday)

The Box:

When we have a “heart at war,” we’re “in the box.”

Signs You’re in the Box:

• Seeing others as obstacles, vehicles, or irrelevancies
• Justifying your behavior
• Magnifying others’ faults
• Minimizing your own contribution
• Feeling victimized

How We Get in the Box:

1. We have an instinct to help/do right
2. We betray it (don’t act on it)
3. We justify the betrayal
4. We start seeing others negatively

Getting Out of the Box:

• See others as people, not objects
• Take responsibility for your contribution
• Let go of needing to be right
• Ask: “What do THEY need?”

Day 300 (Saturday) - Lighter Day

Four Styles of Being in the Box:

Your Box Patterns:

Which style do you default to in conflict?

• Better Than (feeling superior)
• Worse Than (feeling victimized)
• I Deserve (feeling entitled)
• Must Be Seen As (worried about image)

What triggers this?

What would “heart at peace” look like in that situation?

Day 301 (Sunday) - Integration

How the Frameworks Connect:

┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│                     HEART AT PEACE                           │
│              (Foundation for everything else)                │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
                              ↓
┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│              DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS                         │
│         Three Conversations: What Happened, Feelings,        │
│                      Identity                                │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
                              ↓
┌───────────────────────┐     ┌────────────────────────────────┐
│    GETTING TO YES     │     │    NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION    │
│  Interests > Positions│     │   Observations, Feelings,      │
│  BATNA, Mutual Gain   │     │     Needs, Requests            │
└───────────────────────┘     └────────────────────────────────┘
                              ↓
┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│              THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK                         │
│    Truth, Relationship, Identity Triggers → Receiving well   │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘

Week 43 Checkpoint

Before moving to Week 44, you should have:

• Read “Getting Past No”
• Read “The Anatomy of Peace”
• Understood the 5 Breakthrough Strategies
• Identified your “box” patterns
• Created 25+ flashcards (cumulative)

Week 44: Integration, Practice, Phase 4 Completion

Goal: Practice with role-plays, complete reflection, consolidate learning

Day 302 (Monday)

Role-Play Practice 1: Giving Difficult Feedback

AI prompt:

I need to practice giving difficult feedback.

Scenario: I need to tell a colleague that their work quality has been slipping.

Play the role of the colleague. Start defensive, but respond realistically to good technique.

I'll practice:
1. Starting from the "Third Story"
2. Using "And Stance"
3. Sharing observations (not judgments)
4. Expressing my feelings and needs
5. Making a clear request

Give me feedback on my approach after each exchange.

Conflict Analysis Journal:

Think of a past conflict. Analyze it:

Day 303 (Tuesday)

Role-Play Practice 2: Salary Negotiation

AI prompt:

I want to practice negotiating a raise.

Play the role of my manager who:
- Has budget constraints
- Values me but hasn't offered a raise
- Might be defensive

I'll practice:
1. Starting with interests (not positions)
2. Using objective criteria
3. Building a "golden bridge"
4. Knowing my BATNA

Start the conversation with "What did you want to talk about?" and respond realistically.

NVC Daily Practice Plan:

For the next week, practice NVC:

Day 304 (Wednesday)

Role-Play Practice 3: Receiving Critical Feedback

AI prompt:

I want to practice receiving critical feedback well.

Give me feedback on my:
- Communication style (tell me I interrupt too much)
- Work quality (tell me my reports are too detailed)
- Collaboration (tell me I don't include others enough)

Deliver it realistically - with some truth and some inaccuracy.

I'll practice:
1. Not getting defensive
2. Asking clarifying questions
3. Separating content from giver
4. Finding what's useful
5. Thanking you

Give me feedback on how well I received it.

Day 305 (Thursday)

Phase 4 Reflection Questions:

1. What’s your default conflict style?

   • Avoid (pretend it doesn’t exist)
   • Accommodate (give in to keep peace)
   • Compete (win at all costs)
   • Compromise (meet in the middle)
   • Collaborate (find win-win)

2. Using NVC, reframe a recent difficult interaction:

   • Observation: _______________
   • Feeling: _______________
   • Need: _______________
   • Request: _______________

3. What’s your BATNA in a current situation?

   ---

4. Which feedback trigger affects you most?

   • Truth (you think it’s wrong)
   • Relationship (you reject the source)
   • Identity (it threatens who you are)

5. When is your heart “at war”? What triggers it?

   ---

6. Name three things you’d do differently in past conflicts:

   1. ---

   2. ---

   3. ---

7. What’s the most important skill you’ve learned in Phase 4?

   ---

Day 306 (Friday)

Your Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet:

When conflict arises:

Step 1: Go to the Balcony

• Pause
• Ask: What’s really happening?

Step 2: Check Your Heart

• Am I at war or peace?
• Am I seeing them as a person?

Step 3: Understand the Three Conversations

• What happened? (both stories)
• Feelings (mine and theirs)
• Identity (what’s at stake)

Step 4: Use OFNR

• Observation (not judgment)
• Feeling (not thought)
• Need (universal)
• Request (not demand)

Step 5: Negotiate on Interests

• What do they need?
• What do I need?
• What options satisfy both?

Step 6: Receive Feedback Well

• Separate content from delivery
• Find what’s useful
• Ask: “What’s one thing I could do differently?”

Day 307 (Saturday) - Review Day

Phase 4 Books Summary:

Day 308 (Sunday) - Phase 4 Completion

Phase 4 Complete!

What You’ve Accomplished

Phase 4 (Weeks 39-44):

• “Difficult Conversations” - Stone, Patton, Heen (Three Conversations)
• “Getting to Yes” - Fisher & Ury (BATNA, Principled Negotiation)
• “Nonviolent Communication” - Marshall Rosenberg (OFNR)
• “Thanks for the Feedback” - Stone & Heen (Three Triggers)
• “Getting Past No” - William Ury (5 Breakthrough Strategies)
• “The Anatomy of Peace” - Arbinger Institute (Heart at War/Peace)
• TED Talks (Ury, Heen)
• Multiple role-play practices
• NVC daily practice
• 25+ flashcards

Time Invested

• Months 11-12 Total: ~42-48 hours
• Daily average: ~55 minutes
• Running total: ~320-360 hours

You Now Understand:

• How to navigate the Three Conversations in any conflict
• How to negotiate on interests (not positions)
• How to communicate without triggering defensiveness (NVC)
• How to receive feedback without becoming defensive
• How to break through when others won’t cooperate
• How to maintain a “heart at peace” in conflict

Next Steps: Phase 5 Preview

Phase 5: Build & Create

You’ve learned to understand yourself (Phase 1), understand others (Phase 2), lead (Phase 3), and navigate conflict (Phase 4). Now learn to BUILD.

Phase 5A: Strategy & Finance

Phase 5B: Entrepreneurship

Key insight: Strategy is choosing what NOT to do. Entrepreneurship is creating what doesn’t exist.

Continue to Phase 5A: Strategy & Finance

Troubleshooting

“I’m behind schedule”

Options:

1. Prioritize: If you can only read 3 books: “Difficult Conversations” + “Getting to Yes” + “Nonviolent Communication”
2. Videos: Marshall Rosenberg’s workshop is 3 hours and covers NVC fully
3. Audiobooks: All are excellent on audio
4. Extend: Take 7-8 weeks instead of 6

“These books seem repetitive”

• They build on each other, not repeat
• Each adds a different lens
• Repetition is intentional (spaced learning)

“I don’t have conflicts to practice on”

• Practice on small disagreements
• Use AI role-play extensively
• Practice NVC internally (noticing your own judgments)

“NVC feels awkward”

• It IS awkward at first
• You don’t have to use the exact formula
• The mindset matters more than the words
• Even internal practice changes how you communicate

Quick Reference Card

Three Conversations

1. What Happened - Two stories, both incomplete
2. Feelings - Present in every conflict
3. Identity - Competence, goodness, worthiness

Getting to Yes

1. Separate people from problems
2. Focus on interests, not positions
3. Invent options for mutual gain
4. Use objective criteria
5. Know your BATNA

OFNR (NVC)

• Observation (facts, not judgments)
• Feelings (emotions, not thoughts)
• Needs (universal human needs)
• Request (positive, specific, allows “no”)

Feedback Triggers

• Truth - “It’s wrong!”
• Relationship - “Who are you to say?”
• Identity - “This threatens who I am”

Breakthrough Negotiation

1. Go to the Balcony
2. Step to Their Side
3. Reframe
4. Build a Golden Bridge
5. Use Power to Educate

Heart at Peace vs. War

• Peace: See others as people
• War: See others as objects

Eleven and twelve months complete. You understand yourself (Phase 1), others (Phase 2), leadership (Phase 3), and now conflict navigation (Phase 4). Phase 5 teaches you to build and create - strategy and entrepreneurship.

Continue to Phase 5A: Strategy & Finance

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